40 Most Bloodcurdling Chinese Mistranslations Ever! Warning: You Will Laugh To Death!

Chinese, or more specifically Mandarin, is nowadays the most spoken language in the world with around 2 billion speakers. English on the other hand, is the third most spoken language with an estimate of between 300 – 400 million speakers. [1]

Even though both languages can be regarded as world languages, translations between the two seem to be much more difficult than expected. Especially, when considering the bloodcurdling examples, which we provided below.

Have you ever thought of having a glass of “Cock Light” or “Whiskey & Cock”? Maybe you should add a plate of “Sixi Roasted Husband” or “Meat Fried Cat Ear” to that order! Well, if these choices do not suit you, maybe you are in the wrong restaurant or maybe the translator of the menu card needs to take a language course.

Nevertheless, we have to acknowledge that we would not have laughed so hard, when the translators would have visited a language course. Therefore, please do not take language courses! Enjoy…

F*ck Vegetables!

“干菜” means dried vegetables and “类” means type. So as a whole, it should be the dried vegetables section. The translator was way too concerned about the Chinese character “干” which is also a slang for f***.” (Image credits: chinalert.com)

Beware of Safety

Image credits: Chris Radley


Image credits: stefan

Hand Grenade

Image credits: imgur.com

No Discunt

Image credits: AtticDweller


Image credits: sousveillance

Execution in Progress

Image credits: chinawhisper.com

One of Those Time Sex Things…

Image credits: keso

Poor Duck…

Image credits: offbeatchina.com

Reverse Psychology!

Image credits: chinawhisper.com

Please Do Not Disturb!

Image credits: imgur.com


Image Credits: Unknown

Hmmm… OK!

Image Credits: Unknown

Wang Had to Burn

Image credits: mursu909


Image credits: MFinChina

Special Fresh Crap

Image credits: offbeatchina.com

No Shitting

Image credits: TrevinC

Don’t Be Edible

Image credits: dingadingdang

Evil Rubbish

Image credits: engrish.com

Cat Ear?!

Image credits: joshbateman

Potato the Crap

Image credits: Andy Stoll

Don’t Order the Greenstuffs!

Image credits: MFinChina


Image credits: megoizzy

Slip and Fall Down Carefully!

Image credits: tinypic.com

Good to know!

Image Credits: Unknown

Don’t Touch Yourself!

Image credits: offbeatchina.com

Racist Park

Image credits: offbeatchina.com

Grab Me Now!

Image credits: unknown

Beware of Missing Foot

Image credits: Chris Radley

Stupid Beans

Image credits: MFinChina

Cheap, Fast & Easy

Image credits: mstaken.com

You Are the Best!

Image credits: imgur.com

F*ck Goods!

Image Credits: Unknown

No Smoking The Bed!

Image Credits: Unknown

Crap Stick

Image credits: mtrank


Image credits: AtticDweller

Unlike Put Your Shoes On My Face

Image credits: buzzfeed.com

Thanks to everyone!

Image Credits: Unknown

The Wild Germ Hates Soup

Image credits: David Feng


Image credits: imgur.com

Please Share with your friends and family:

    • Joe blow

      You and I both. I think I shit my pants after the “cunt examination” sign.

    • Correcting people 4 no reason

      I’m not sure if you’re bored or if you’re really stupid, but it’s a mistranslation. 干 is a character with many meanings, mostly an equivalent of ‘do’ and is slang for ‘f***’. While I’m not sure how to translate 干爆鸭子 into english, It most definitely did not have anything to do with explosions of f***ing a duck. Please think before you post

      • soiledwig

        Salman was clearly joking.

    • Guest


      • tr33m4n


      • ngtitao

        Mr Guest, you should really go to that “racist park”

        • Guest

          … And fuck the duck until explodes

      • Jacky Toh

        Racist park was specially builded for u sir

    • Marny F

      Believe me, more Chinese can speak English than those of us in English-speaking countries speaking Chinese.

      I can’t even write that sentence properly! LOL

    • Peter

      Thank you Gky Leung for your explanation

    • No.

      Firstly, the move to use the standard form of alphabetised Chinese, known as pinyin, happened in the 1950s. The intention for pinyin was never to encourage people to learn English, it was to help improve literacy among Chinese people (for means of disseminating party information and propaganda). Pinyin is simpler to learn as it is based on 26 letters of the roman alphabet rather than thousands of characters. By first learning the sounds of spoken mandarin, it provides a stepping stone to reading characters, which the CCP also simplified to increase literacy rates.

    • RAC

      Are you mad?

    • i2matrix

      even 8% of total “1.2 billion people” are more than enough for any numbers of call centers setup.

    • i2matrix

      even 8% of total “1.2 billion people” are more than enough for any numbers of call centers setup.

    • goaway

      The cat ear means macaroni….

  • Lorelei Mercer

    I’m going to go eat some Slut Soup, with a side of Whatever.

    • Filip Dačke Dačić

      Than go to cunt examination… xD lol

    • Charles J. Cizek

      And a Whiskey & Cock to drink!

    • Rinka Csc

      Whatever is a glass of juice ;)

    • Marcinema

      I think I’d wait to see who buys, Slut Soup, and chat her up, ask her out for a Whiskey and Cock.
      Once drunk, I’ll try to find out if she’s had a recent Cunt Examination. If I don’t get lucky, guess I’ll have to get the Duck, and…

  • DB

    Are yo supposed to stir the whiskey with your…uh nevermind!

  • Cassandra

    “we would not have laughed so hard, when the translators would have visited a language course” – seems you could use an English language course yourself!

  • chuck

    A bit annoying that the title of each picture ruined it before the picture was seen. Took effort to ignore the title to get the laugh which only the picture can give. Try it again without titles…

  • WildCat

    I’d prefer 500ml cock for just 2.80. Grab me now! 😀

  • Wollo

    I live in Sudan and like to go to a restaurant where I can get a ‘hot dog bikini’ ‘brain pain’ as well as some ‘Shrimp/viagra’ and in another restaurant some ‘bathroom soup’… :)

  • Wollo

    I live in Sudan and like to go to a restaurant where I can get a ‘hot dog bikini’ ‘brain pain’ as well as some ‘Shrimp/viagra’ and in another restaurant some ‘bathroom soup’… :)

  • Eugene Jesudason

    Yes the England is very powerderful.

  • porcelain sandwich

    They don’t beat around the bush by calling it a ‘Cunt Examination’. Oh wait, maybe they do.

  • gerry

    It’s a good laugh. But chinese are kind, hard working and proud people. Very open to learning,

  • RAC

    You are only including English as a mother tongue in your numbers, when you include English as a second language then the numbers are very, very different.

  • zac

    google translate maybe hahaha

  • Lina

    Meanwhile, in Japan.

  • David Longey

    When we finally meet the aliens, we’d better hope they’re a whole lot more patient and even-tempered than us, because communications are going to be even more difficult.

  • Nelson K Nelson

    English DOMINATES Mandarin by about 2 billion to 900 million. Where in the flying fuck this article got the number 340 million as speakers of English I have no clue, since the US, UK, and Canada have about 450 million, just for starters, not counting all the nations that have English as an official language (examples: India, Philippines, Singapore). Unlike Mandarin, which has almost ZERO humans on this planet who speak it as a secondary language — not even many Cantonese do so, despite being in the same country, English has almost five times as many people who speak it as a second-language than do so for a primary language.

    Interestingly, that includes almost 50 million people who speak Mandarin as a primary language. Versus near zero in the reverse situation. And English use is growing much faster than Mandarin — approximately 100 times the pace. Soon all of India’s 1 billion+ people will speak it — almost all of them speak big chunks of it. And speaking as for language-creep, where words of one language get picked up into another, English leads the planet by a whopping 1,000-to-1 ratio. Versus Mandarin, it’s almost INFINITE, since ZERO Mandarin words have crept into common English usage in the last 50 years whereas virtually all of simple English words (20,000 or so) have crept into Mandarin.

    Stop trying to be politically correct about the dominance of English. Nobody on the planet is learning Mandarin, and EVERYBODY is learning English. Mandarin is tonal and genetically about half the damn planet can’t distinguish the tones — they’ve isolated the genes for it… this isn’t rocket surgery, here, folks.

    When the planet speaks one language, it will be English — the largest language in the world with 650,000 standard usage words, and in the millions if you count all possible variations. Yet, despite its vast size, it’s so flexible that it’s possible to communicate in English at extremely high efficiency with a working vocabulary of less than 1000 words.

    Nobody is learning Mandarin, and nobody will be. Everybody is learning English, and everybody will be. Quit trying to look neutral (or just damn stupid) by ignoring actual fact.